Hello from Stockholm :) City number eight :D

3110km into the walk now and it seems to be going well. Reached the city centre last night (five days ahead of schedule) after an eventful 16 days on the road again, and I truly hope this week will be as fruitful as my short time in Copenhagen.

First, I need to thank some wonderful Danes :)

‘Citycamp’, run by ‘Finn’, the healthiest looking old guy I’ve ever met, wasn’t not so much a campsite but a carpark with electrical sockets. Right next to Denmark’s touring Circus, it seemed fun at first, seeing random Elephants and packs of snow-white huskies milling around the centre of Copenhagen but after the third time I’d been woken up at 3am by a horrific bellowing screech (of what I presume was a walrus…) the novelty soon wore off…Hearing the reasons I’d walked there from London, Finn wouldn’t accept any payment for my week long stay. Bless him. The Road to Change is a charity project but we never expect anything free. Finn’s kindness wasn’t unique, it seemed. After all the random drivers who’d stopped to offer me a lift as I walked up their country, I had already figured out Denmark is full of nice folk.

First night there, I met Niels Holm, a Danish artist who’s work has been featured in London’s Tate Modern and who is active in the cities Film Festival. He and I are now talking about the possibility of ‘To Kill a Kelpie’ being screened in Copenhagen in the coming months. Unfortunately, I wont be able to walk back to be there for it but we’ll figure something out…

Copenhagen’s British Embassy were again incredibly helpful. They organised an interview with the Copenhagen Post and reached out to radio and TV on my behalf. The Post were extremely kind in giving me and hour long interview where I was able to explain in great detail the reasons I walk and the many things I’d observed about the situation for survivors in the countries I’d walked through. Their article was excellent but despite many follow up calls, the radio and TV people were non-responsive and in the end never came to anything. It’s difficult to raise awareness about child sexual abuse when the people controlling the media don’t regard a man walking 10,000miles to highlight the issue as ‘Newsworthy’

‘Palle Bo’, a radio commercial producer and friend of a friend (God Bless Facebook…) introduced me to Helle Borrowman, director of Spor, a Danish survivor organisation. Helle invited me for dinner then I gave a presentation to her members. I met around twelve Danish Survivors and even though I hadn’t prepared a presentation, I realised I can easily speak for an hour by simply explaining how I came to be the European Ambassador for Stop the Silence: Stop Child Sexual Abuse and the things I’ve learned in the past six countries I walked through. I told them about the unique work of Blue Angel in Paris, who work with Pedophiles but not child sex offenders. (men and woman who realise they are sexually attracted to children but seek support to control their urges rather than violate a child) I explained about the survivors I encountered in Luxembourg, who cannot press charges against their offender even though he still works with children. There was the visit to the European Parliament in Brussels, where I realised any EU citizen has the right to launch an Initiative to reform child protection laws across the continent. Then there was the strange political party in the Netherlands who actually campaign for the right to have sex with young teens and most recently, the progress the German government appear to be making with their innovative reforms of the Statute of Limitations. I realised as I recounted my experiences to them that I’m only 20% of the way round Europe and its already been a very illuminating journey. When I mentioned that in the UK I appear on a kids TV show, they asked me if I’d like to use my profile to speak to children about sexual abuse. Even I was surprised that my answer was ‘No’. I don’t think they realised the character I’m known for entertains children under five, and while I’m happy to speak to teens about my life and experiences, I wouldn’t like to attempt to engage children so young on the issue. It breaks my heart that in reality it is necessary to warm children so young of the dangers of our world but this is an area where I like to remind people I am not a psychologist or therapist. Many wonderful storybooks and programs such as the ‘underwear code’ or the ‘uh-oh feeling’ have been carefully designed (by far cleverer people than me) to be develop-mentally appropriate. These sophistocated tools arm children with understanding without traumatising them with fear of what can happen. Like perhaps many survivors, one thing my uncle stole from me was my innocence. When kids in my class were writing to Santa for a Micro Machine Super-city Toolbox, a Lego Pirate-Ship or My Little Pony, I already knew what an orgasm felt like. I didn’t know the word for it but I gathered that because it felt nice it had to be very bad…I hate this but I can’t go back and wash it away, no matter how far I walk…With my nieces and nephews, I and all my family are vigilant about their safety but we also go to great lengths to protect that innocence. It’s the precious and irreplaceable essence of childhood. I’ve seen many christmases where my exhausted brothers and sisters are still up at 4am, wrapping presents, meticulously wallpapering a doll’s house or assembling a trampoline in a pitch back freezing garden, all just to preserve that beautiful moment when the kids wake up and set their eyes on the tangible magic that ‘Santa’s been’. This is what childhood should be about. So no…I don’t want to speak to kids about child sexual abuse…but I am glad others in the world know how to.

Helle taught me about the current legal situation for survivors in Denmark, which is better than some countries but still far from Justice. Recent reform of the limitation laws means that from now on, abused children in Denmark will have 10 to 15 years from the day of their 21st birthday to report the crime. (Perviously their 18th birthday) This also depends on the nature of the abuse…What can court accurately quantify the impact the abuse has on the rest of the survivors life? Don’t get me started…These reforms still do not serve the hundreds (quite possibly thousands) of Danish survivors who are already older than the new age limit but ready to make a report, and who’s abuser might be old yet quite possibly still in contact with vulnerable children. When comprehensive reform of these laws finally arrives, it must take into account the millions across Europe who have information that concerns child safety and also afords these many survivors the chance of Justice for their years of suffering.

Time to get walking again…

Ally Milton, a friend from Scotland, flew out to take Yvonne by the wheel. With an enthusiasm for Camper-vans and not lacking in banter, I had a feeling it was going to be a fun walk up through Sweden. We set off on time and the British Ambassador in Copenhagen, Vivian Life, walked with me for a wee while. She shares my conviction that Denmark is populated by deeply lovely people. Her colleague at the Embassy had arranged for a free meal at one of the city’s top seafood restaurants, ‘Kodbyens Fiskebar’. The eight courses of Nordic cuisine was a culinary experience I’ll never forget. Not long after waving bye to the Ambassador, I was joined for a few kilometres by the Danish songwriter, John Lansner. John had been at my presentation to Spor and wanted a chance to chat one-on-one with me. He is a delight of a man, a laughter therapist, artist and engineer, I was fascinated by all his stories. He gave me a number of CDs of his music, one he’d recorded live for me that morning and he also gave me a red clown nose, because well, why not? :) I have a feeling I’ll be hearing more from John. He cycled off after an hour but it seems I was not meant to walk alone that day. Very shortly after John left I was joined by yet another kind Dane. Frederik Van Deurs is an anthropologist but also runs his own recording studio. He’d had a very busy few weeks and decided he needed a nice long walk. His parents live about six hours north of Copenhagen so he decided just to head out that morning and fortunately for both of us, I would be walking past his folks house on my route to Helsingor (Prince Hamlet’s House…) It was so nice to walk and chat all that way with someone. The miles flew past. When we finally reached his village, I still had an hour more to go but we sat for wee while on a jetty. Fred wanted me to sample the local Ice-cream, which was as awesome as he’d promised. The light was fading so I stood up to head off on the final few kilometres but then, as I watched Fred try to stand, I suddenly realised how well my body has adapted to walking 150mile a week. Poor Fred looked like he’d been hit by a bus. He decided he needed a long walk and the beautiful Danish coast looking over to Sweden is an ideal place to clear your head but he knew he could jump on a train to his parents place at any point if it got too much. After hearing how far I’d walked, Fred was determined to make it the whole 40km but if you suddenly walk for six hours then sit down for ten minutes, your body wont want you to get up. Many people say they want to or are going to come over and walk with me, and I really hope many do, but the first five weeks were tough. Your body wont understand what’s happening or why you keep punishing it and they pain in the morning will try to convince you to stop. The first week is the most intense, literally full of blood, sweat and tears, so those of you who are serious about joining me, even for a few days, please do as much walking as you can so your feet and legs have a chance to get used to it.

I learned the following morning, when I saw Fred’s Facebook post about me that he initially thought I was some crazy drunk guy, but when got close enough to read the back of my t-shirt (“I walked here from London”) he of course realised that I was just a crazy sober guy…and that morning I walked aboard the boat to Sweden…but I’ll tell you all about that next time…

Thanks for reading :)

Matty x